It seems like forever since I blogged last and I want to be open with my readers about where I have been. Some may fault me for this saying I don’t have to reveal my sins to the world and yet in 1 Corinthians the Apostle Paul explains to us,
“Do you not know that in a race all the runners compete, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain in it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. Well, I do not run aimlessly, I do not box as one beating the air; but I pommel my body and subdue it, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” (1 Corinthians 9:24-27 RSV)
The apostle Paul prepared himself every day to fight temptation and to exhibit self control. He did this so that after preaching to others he didn’t lose his qualification to spread the good news of the gospel and to teach Jew and Gentile alike how to serve the Lord and to truly follow Him.
Some may say to themselves that I am telling you this to be classified as Holy but the Lord knows that I am not and if there is any of that in me at all I pray for Him to put it to death and ask for your forgiveness immediately. Either way, being that I serve the Lord and not man I am deciding here and now to have no fear one way or the other, to be vulnerable. and to share this with all of you. My hope is that in my doing so, my future deliverance will encourage and strengthen my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ and not cause any of you to stumble in your faith (Romans 14:21) or repeat the same mistakes that I have made. I want you as well to know that I take this blogging of the Word of God seriously and value your souls and my position.
“Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.” (James 3:1)
So with all of that said I want all of you to know that I have been cohabiting with my fiance for a time. Some of you may wonder what the problem is with that and yet the bible is clear that we are to flee from sexual immorality and the temptations to sin. While this is no longer occurring with us, it was for a time, until the Holy Spirit stirred my heart with conviction. Cohabiting with ones significant other outside of marriage also goes against the Word of God which says that we are not to give even the appearance of sin.
“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” (1 Corinthians 7:2)
22 “Abstain from all appearance of evil.” (1 Thessalonians 5:22)
For the time being I will be taking time out in prayer and seeing where the Lord will lead me. I have been waiting for some time for housing accommodations and have even brought myself to the shelter where I experienced a heightened sense of anxiety and turned myself back around. I say this to let you know that I have learned and am continuing to learn that doing things in my own strength without adequate prayer, fellowship, Godly counsel and silence is NOT the way to confess or to truly repent. The Word of God is clear that it is by the grace of God alone that we are brought to repentance as the Apostle Paul says in (Romans 2:4),
“Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?”
So to end this time for now and this moment I want to encourage you with this: wait on the Lord. If you are a new Christian in all things wait on the Lord. If you have been a Christian for a long time in all things wait on the Lord. I wrote a small poem this morning which speaks mountains to what I am now facing and which will hopefully inspire all of you to keep on waiting in the desert of the wilderness and to remember that in all things even there, God is good. God bless all of you and may my return bring honor and glory to the name of our Lord and to His blessed deliverance. Amen.
You are good Lord even in the waiting.
In the middle of my suffering,
You’ll still find me waiting,
For Lord even in the waiting,
You are still good.